I have always known that meeting a real life prince and having him fall hopelessly in love with me was a real possibility. After all, Prince William is close to my age, and he went to that boys campus of Geelong Grammer in the same year as an old friend of mine....
How was I to know that my Blog-Soapie-Star Nemesis and I are actually psychically connected, and all along the royal destiny is actually hers and I have just dreamt it by association.
That's right, her life just keeps getting better. She met a prince, AND HE HIT ON HER!.
But as we all know, my nemesis and I do not have much in common these days. Apparently the dream has never crossed her mind. At the moment their eyes met, there was no fairy dust or sparkles, and she was content to play hard to get and leave the encounter as nothing but blog fodder. Okay, so it was Harry and not William, but seriously, he's the better pick of the two anyway. Being a Princess forever sounds a lot cuter and more youthful than 'Future Queen', and you get the best of royal life without the pressure. Plus Harry seems to have a lot more freedom in his choices, so Old Lizzy would be less likely to give you the Kate Middleton treatment. But Kate Middleton could be your new best friend!!!!! Oh the JOY!
I can't believe it. She told him she was engaged to be married, leaving him disappointed, but still openly admiring her wares and wiles in a way that remained respectable to her fiance...
I don't care if you're engaged to our generations version of Fabio, John Holmes, JFK, James Dean, or freakin' Justin Bieber in 10 years time, there is no fathomable reason worthy enough to reject the advances of real life royalty.
Mind you, since our last catch up, she has changed jobs twice, and featured as an extra in two movies, one of which she had a 'feature' role as the object of desire in a bikini on a li-lo in a resort pool, and is heading to an exotic location in two months time for her dream wedding surrounded by throngs of international friends and family.
I cannot hide my jealousy this time round, or manipulate my words to sound less envious in any way shape or form. I am struggling to even be happy for her.
But I after this blog post, I resolve to swallow the lump of green stuck in my throat, or hack it up like the big dirty ugly loogie it is (sorry if you're eating). Either way, I will put it far from my mind, and bring my focus back to my own fortunes. I'm not royalty, and I'm not getting married in an exotic location, but I'm not doing too bad.
Right now, I am on an all expenses paid work trip, writing this from the sixth floor of a Melbourne Hotel, complete with views of the Yarra Valley. Sipping on sparkles and munching on some tasty sushi, the kind that's rolled in that caviar stuff.
And I have my own spunky bf waiting for me in a beautiful old (dirty) country farmhouse, where he is googling the ins and outs of hobby farming, and planning a golfing/winery visiting day for this weekend with friends.
Hmmmm, maybe I wouldn't drop everything for Harry......